March 19th or there about 2014/2557 Issue 20
Editor’s Note: We’re up to eight readers and have received our second valid contribution. Slap my face and wake me up… We’re in thin air. It’s almost like we are high enough to eat Eagle food… so we’ll start Issue twenty with this bit of lifted material we may be sued for using…. As it was told to me I pass it on to you:
I once visited a condom factory in Thailand. This factory had started out making baby bottle nipples, and still made a few. The nipple making machine made a noise that sounded a bit like poop, pip, poop, pip, poop pip as it first formed the nipples and then made a small hole.
Then I was taken to see the lines that made the condoms. These machines made a noise that sounded only like poop, poop, poop, poop. Once in a while I thought I heard a pip. I ask the guide and was told, “Well, we do not wish to go out of the nipple business altogether.
Udon Expats are throwing some serious money around… we have been eating breakfast out three times a week…. Western, mostly.
Monday it’s Nobi’s at 10:00am, the Chef’s Table on Wednesday at 10:00am and the Blue Orchids on Friday at 10:00am.
So far we have solved none of the world’s problems… Join us if you can.
Am I the only one who married a crazy lady?
You have dropped a right hook with that ten word essay of yours. Without the foggiest clue we have passed your letter over to the Detective writing division where we know it will get the attention it deserves.
We may be stepping out on a limb here but we imagine you have recently arrived in country, made a dash through all the dives of Pattaya and instead of settling in a condo in sin city have traveled north where you found the most luscious of brides under some coconut tree (we avoid suggesting you found her in a rice paddy.) and have forthwith married her before she threatened to age even in the least. Are we spot on so far? Should we have said rice paddy?
Now we really venture. When you failed to include any specifics such as crazy in the head or crazy sexual stuff we couldn’t help but wonder if we shouldn’t have your wife in for consultation….with, let’s say wine. With no information we are totally unprepared to offer a diagnosis but shall anyway.
“Crazy is as crazy does” is a quote we have heard more often than we care to remember since signing up for the Gold Premium Cable Package and being subjected to Forrest Gump six times a week during prime time. Quoting Forrest Gump may be your answer.
We suggest you buy the same Gold Premium Cable Package and then sit down to watch the Forrest Gump reruns until you have memorized the movie… we like the part where he decided to stop running the best.
The Sun has gone to sleep
Is that bad?
Scientist are saying that our sun is going through a ten year “sleeping “cycle. They report that the nicer softer side of the sun’s activities will bring really cold winters to some places and milder weather to other places….
It has been suggested that Great Britain will be one of the colder spots on earth and Greenland will start to live up to its’ sunny sounding name more so than it has since the last time this happened in the eighteenth century….
Warmer weather in Greenland will probably be classified as harsh weather for those folks…can you imagine them buying Hawaii Bob shirts and Bermuda shorts and having to decide whether to wear white socks with their sandals.
The people in Great Britain will have to decide if they are going to wear their foul weather gear indoors. This sleepy sun is going to cause all kind of problems.
NASA Camera Bugs
By our Science editor: Fred Filmsy
The folks at NASA went to a lot of expense in an effort to bring back the first photos of earth from the other side of the moon… I’m thinking of the photo taken from the orbiter that showed a slice of the moon in the bottom of the frame and showed the earth as a small ball of cloud covered blue in the center of the frame. That photo was a gateway to our imaginations at a time when mere words would not have worked.
That photo had to be taken at the right moment with all lens settings properly thought out. Not an easy task considering that the spacecraft from which the photo was taken was traveling from the back side of the moon at a hefty pace. Those astronauts had but a small window of opportunity to make the photo that blew our minds. The astronauts were good.
Matter of fact the astronauts were so camera savvy that I imagine they went out of pocket just to get the best training they could find and I’m going to say that it was to Thailand they went. I say that without the least bit of knowledge or authority. I just feel that way. Where would you have gone?
I follow the “rule of 10,000”. It has been reported that many of the great people of our time had to put in a lot of time learning their trade before they emerged into the public arena hailed as geniuses. Bill Gates’ success is explained by using the “rule of 10,000”. It is said that he spent more than 10,000 hours on a computer before he developed the software that propelled him into cyber space… You can say the same about Steve Jobs or the Beatles.
In explanation of the Beatles it must be remembered that they played some rough clubs in Germany and in some hole in the wall bar in Liverpool before emerging after 10,000 hours of arduous playing with their musical talent integrated nicely into nice new clothes, and haircuts. They blasted off into the stratosphere shortly after that.
Apply the rule of 10,000 to the astronaut’s photo training in Thailand and you will probably start to buy into my reasoning and understand why the astronauts surprised us all by being such good shutter bugs. Thailand was where the astronauts honed their photo skills with over 10,000 hours behind the lens. They photographed everything that moved or didn’t move, including the real or the imagined with intent to sort fantasy from truth later.
That’s an important hurdle for anyone who is going to lead an accelerated life in Thailand or in the vastness of space. Whizzing by things real or imagined for the first time and not knowing which is real and which is not can be a daunting experience. Most people need about 10,000 hours.